God Knows The Outcome

That was the title of my devotion this morning and Lord knows I sure needed to read it. I've had several frustrations this week and it all came to a head this morning.

Cerys got sick again Monday evening, her birthday!! It's been one illness after another since starting Nursery. They've all been viral according to the doctors so we've just been keeping her home a few days each time to get her well. Unfortunately, some parents continue to send their child to school even though they are sick and it just cycles back around. I took her to the doctor on Tuesday, he agreed she was burning up (they usually don't check temperature, but he felt her head and could tell she had a fever) and her tonsils were red and swollen and her cough was pretty bad- but still gave me the speech about how we overuse antibiotics and it's usually for the parents to relieve anxiety and make you think your child is getting better but in reality it's just the virus running it's course. I'm totally in agreement about the overuse of medicine, but I can't remember the last time she was on antibiotics so I was not really there to beg for medicine. Anyway.

Bailey has had an Ear, Nose and Throat doctor appointment set for tomorrow- it's been on the calendar for about 6 months. I was really looking forward to seeing how her ears were doing and if her "grommits" (tubes) have grown out yet. I also had some questions for the doctor. We got a letter yesterday saying that "due to other circumstances" that appointment has been cancelled and rescheduled for February 12th. Which is 3 days after my due date- it could be a tricky time. On the NHS, you can not request a day or time for an appointment it just sent to you in the post and you either take it or you don't. I guess I learned my lesson here, because I rescheduled the first appointment they sent me and I now realize I should have just changed my plans and taken the first one.

My minor operation, that was suppose to be on Friday, to remove my gland was cancelled today. Marc has to be in London all day and I had arranged for someone to keep the girls so I could get this done. I was told I could come at 10am and it would be about a 2 hour ordeal- by the time I did paperwork, paid and had the gland removed,etc. Well the hospital rang this morning requesting for me to be there at 7am. After explaining that I could not do that because my daughter had to be at school at 8:55am and my husband would be gone from early that morning, the appointment had to be cancelled. Stink! The next time my doctor is scheduled for outpatients is December 19th. A whole month! His secretary was very nice about it and felt bad for the time switch, so she was going to speak to him tomorrow and see if he could work me into his office time and she will get back to me tomorrow. So that is what I'm praying for. I was ready to get this over with and know the results, but God is in control. (This is a private doctor, so it's not all NHS that is messed up.)

To end my day today, I had an appointment with my midwife. I have to have a decision made in the next two weeks about which hospital I will deliver in. The one that is basically right behind our house or the one across town- I have yet to visit but I hope to soon. Some day soon I will have to write about the differences between prenatal care in the States and here. It's not just a matter of me deciding where I want to go- there are many factors involved so I'm just praying for peace. My midwife told me today that she thinks my labor will be super fast and I would not have time to get to the other hospital so that makes Marc really nervous now :)

So, as the tears flowed around mid-day, I felt led to pick up my little devotional book and here is what it said-

"Leave outcomes up to me. Follow me wherever I lead, without worrying about how it will all turn out. Think of your life as an adventure, with Me as your Guide and Companion. Live in the now, concentrating on staying in step with Me. When our path leads to a cliff, be willing to climb it with My help. When we come to a resting place, take time to be refreshed in My presence. Enjoy the rhythm of life lived close to Me."

Thank you Lord that in the midst of this chaos, you know the outcome! I'm sorry for my stinky attitude today and for complaining so much. Thank you for these opportunities to lean close into you.